Photo used with permission from Mimbrava - www.Flickr.com
This red rose photo ties together nicely with a post I've been wanting to write for awhile now. As many of you are already aware from what I have written previously I am a huge fan of Tori Amos, the musician.
It just so happens Tori has endometriosis. So I'm using that as my excuse to write a post featuring some lyrics from her song: 'Almost Rosey' (from the American Doll Posse CD).
Before I get into any lyrics or my interpretation of them and what they do to inspire me and to give me strength during the especially tough times, I just want to lay the foundation for WHY I'm writing about this here on the blog... (other than my love of Tori Amos' music).
Over 7 years of facilitating a local endometriosis support group, I have noticed that MANY of our support group members share a common thread. For some it has to do with upbringing. For some it's a personal philosophy. For others, it's the only way they know how to cope with this challenging illness.
The common thread I've noticed for most endometriosis patients is that they often:
Let me be clear that I don't sit in judgment of anyone (!!) and I know how very difficult it is to balance home/personal life, work life (for those still well enough to pursue a career outside the home or those who manage to work from home), social life/obligations, chronic illness(es) and the many other commitments that take up our precious time nowadays. There never seem to be enough hours in the day!
An endometriosis patient may be:
I have observed that ALL women nowadays (that I know) are feeling the pressure of many demands on their time and this typically just becomes much *more* challenging for the chronically ill.
OK... back to some of the music that gets me through some of my roughest days! I should point out that the music that works for me may not be most effective for you for coping with illness, stress and/or anxiety. The important thing is that most of us have SOME sort of music we find relaxing, inspirational, supportive, or even cheerful. Sometimes the lyrics really strike us and provide extra comfort. Sometimes it's the melody, the beat, or maybe an outstanding vocalist. Many times it's all of the above.
OK. It's time for me to list the lyrics for "Almost Rosey" and explain what they mean to me personally. They may certainly mean different things to different people but I'll talk about how the lyrics strike me. Obviously this is just one interpretation.
*Let me give just a bit more background on why I'm including lyrics for this particular song.*
Many women I know (from my local endometriosis support group, healthy friends & relatives, former co-workers, blogger friends, etc.), myself included, have times when they really push their limits physically, mentally, or both! Self-care is key. A support network of some kind is key.
You may have heard phrases like "grin and bear it" or "put on your happy face" or "be strong/don't let 'them' know they've gotten to you".
While there are certainly times in life when we all need to do things we don't want to do, to even do things we're concerned may cause injury or exacerbation of existing illnesses, and to do things that are simply necessary for basic functioning... there are definitely other times when it's in our best interest (and/or that of our loved ones... whether they know it or not!) NOT to push too hard and NOT to overwork! Knowing when to back off and when to push ahead is a tricky balancing act. Taking pains NOT to overdo can prevent suffering & sometimes even permanent pain afterwards, etc.)
Many women have a REALLY tough time slowing down, pacing themselves, and saving precious energy for the things that REALLY matter!
OK. Here's where this song is one of my favorites to play when I need a pick-me-up.
Here is a video clip of an amazing live rendition of this beautiful song:
Below are the lyrics to "Almost Rosey". I have bolded portions I find particularly helpful to me for insights into how people (women and men) sometimes "put on a happy mask", isolate themselves from support when they need it most, etc. My comments are in italics.
I should note that simply reading the lyrics off the page may sound anything but "rosey" or cheerful. However, knowing Tori's body of work for over 15 years, reading between the lines of the lyrics, knowing she is about as far from a "phony" or "fake" person as can be, and hearing the beautiful melody and soothing sound of the music on this song softens it immensely. Tori is a complex person and her lyrics can be deceiving. For example, her talk of putting rose colored glasses on to cope with things is NOT, in my opinion, implying that one should stick his/her head in the sand!! Quite the opposite... Tori bravely faces things head on! My comments on the lyrics will be in italics next to the lyrics I've bolded in the song...
+++
» 'Almost Rosey' Lyrics
[This Section features Lyrics of the Song 'Almost Rosey' from the Album American Doll Posse]:
Just a minute of your time
Yes I've been known to delude myself
So let me put those rose colored glasses to the test
(I believe this is her way of saying let's cope with these problems rather than avoiding them).
Now is this real enough for you
'cause blondes here don't jump out of cakes
If that never impressed you much
Come board this lunatic express
Just why do they say
Have a nice day anyway
We both know they wouldn't mind
If I just curled up and died
Let's not give that one a try
(I think this section is Tori's way of observing how fake people can be when they exchange pleasantries they don't mean, when they act insincerely, and when they generally disregard -too often - others' well-being).
Chin up put on a pair of these roseys
Raise those blinds
Chin up a happy mask was never
Your best disguise
Chin up put on a pair of these roseys
In no time you will feel almost fine
(I believe Tori is offering coping skills to either herself or someone else. She seems to be trying to fight the urge to isolate and "close the blinds". She recognizes that stuffing emotions and putting on a "happy mask' is not healthy. She wants things to start looking up and believes things WILL get better).
Almost rosey
Now some girls here will huddle with
No not footballers that are rich
But will confide in small white sticks
He bats as The Virginian Slim
Then I tried once to comply
With an authority that would
Subsidize my wild side
But at this altar was sacrificed
Yes you can laugh a femme fatale
In a bride's dress now married to
The effortlessness of the cracks
That lie now in between the facts
(Here again I believe Tori is speaking out against dishonesty in any form... including being phony/fake or insincere).
Now about when violet died
The cause still unidentified
She thought her love would be enough
But you can't seduce seduction
Her tentacles of endless want
Reach through my corridors
And tempt me to taste of her power
I sober with the witching hour
And when I hear of one more bomb
Yes we have all been robbed of song
And nightingales who throw their arms up
When is enough enough?
(To me this passage is pro-peace, for saving the Earth from irreparable harm caused by war and environmental issues. Obviously birds don't have arms but I think the point is clear that she's concerned about the condition the Earth is in and wants very much to improve it).
---
[ Almost Rosey Lyrics @ http://www.toriamoslyrics.org/ ]
Tori Amos
Almost Rosey lyrics are copyright by it's rightful owner. This Tori Amos Lyrics
site (http://www.toriamoslyrics.org/almost-rosey-lyrics-tori-amos.php)
in no way takes copyright or claims the lyrics belong to us.
© 2008 Tori Amos Lyrics.org, All rights
reserved.
---
See my post: Sunday, June 15, 2008 - What is My Connection to Tori Amos??
This article was posted by Jeanne via "Jeanne's Endo Blog" at www.endendoat.blogspot.com.
